Letter to Mr Ride My Ass

Dear Mr. Ride My Ass,

Yes, I see you behind me. In your big semi truck. I notice the speed limit on this little road we are on says 55 miles an hour. I notice that I’m going 60 miles and hour and I also notice that you are getting closer and closer by the minute. I’m pretty impressed by your 70+ miles an hour in that big rig.

I’m pretty sure those teeth on your grill are meant to intimidate me as you fill up my rear view mirror. Grrrrr, I’ll eat you up you silly ice cream truck!”. I can hear it screaming now.

But you know what? I’m not afraid. If anything, I laugh at your over aggressive driving harassment. Ha Ha Ha!  All you make me want to do is slow down to make sure you can’t pass. I have the upper hand on this two lane highway. Sure you might be bigger than me, but I have the power right now. I know those teeth aren’t real.

So you just chill right back and settle in. It’s going to be a long 10 miles for you bub! You done messed with the wrong Pink Ice Cream Truck!

Sincerely,

The nice lady in the truck you are trying to eat.

PS. The Oreo Sundae on the side of the truck is fake. It is not real. So calm down.

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~~~till we laugh again~~~

 

The Heat Makes People Lazy…Beware

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It’s no secret that it gets hot here in Arizona. It’s been 105 – 110 for over a week now.

The problem when it finally hits 100 degrees longer than a day or two, is that people’s brains become fried. Tempers get short and the “stupid” comes out.

Stupid and Tempers do not go well together either.

I could go on forever about the stupid things that happen, but I’d rather share them individually throughout the summer.

Today, I had several complaints from customers, employees and even myself today. What are the odds, we all experienced the same special type of “stupid” today?

It’s not secret the heat zaps us of our energy and ability to think. What you might not know, is this lack of energy is so strong that when we get in our vehicles, we lose the ability to turn our head when we back up. Yep, that turning of our head is so strenuous, that to even attempt might cause immediate nap time.

So we just back up, tossing caution to the wind, and letting the dice roll.

Who cares if there is a car coming…my smart car can take down your SUV

Who cares if a kid is walking behind us….stupid kid shouldn’t be in the street anyways

Who cares if the bicyclist is back there….ride on the sidewalk stupid!

Who cares if the lady with the baby stroller is passing….I’m sure she isn’t attached to the munchkin…

Who cares …I’m tired and it is too much work to turn my head to look!  Is it nap time yet??

Who cares?

Who cares?!

I care dang it!!!   

LOL

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But I will tell ya, the only fun part of this stupidity is when it happens to others. Then it is freaking hilarious….

Just don’t hit the Pink Truck….

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~~~till we laugh again~~~