What The F*** Facts

I’m not sure how many of you have a Facebook account but there is one page that I subscribe to that I love. Each day I get facts that either make me laugh, smile or scratch my head.  I wish their name was a little less graphic at times but it probably is better that way so I’m not always forwarding on their stuff.  LOL.

Their Facebook page is What The F Facts Facebook & their website is What the F*** Facts.

I thought for today I would share some of the cool things from their Facebook posts that I laughed at or found interesting. Give you a little taste if you will.

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More than 98% of people have started laughing even harder when they tried to explain why they were laughing.

(I’d tell ya why I’m laughing but…..baahhhhaa  loolllllloollllll)

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The teen pregnancy rate is actually lower now than it was in the 1970’s

(oh, I’m sure it is from abstinence…… NOT…lol)

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From a survey of 54,000 people, researchers discovered that cancer patients with a sense of humor were 70% more likely to survive.

(I personally believe laughter helps heal most things)

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Scratching your ankle feels as good as sex. Scientists have discovered that ankle is the most satisfying spot to scratch.

(hmmmmmm)

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Cherophobia describes a person who is afraid of being happy because whenever they get too happy, something bad happens.

(How sad…. Just be happy!!)  LOL   .. oh darn, the dog threw up on your carpet now…

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At least 5 people have been murdered for unfriending someone via Facebook.

(I promise I will never unfriend ya now)

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80% of United States deaths happen in hospitals.

(Note to self, never, ever, ever go in a hospital)

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Famous conservationist, Steve Irwin, wants to be fed to his favorite crocodile, Bindi, after his death according to his last will.

(ok my Aussie friends, is this actually true?)

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Every British queen named Jane has either been murdered, imprisoned, gone mad, died young, or been dethroned.

(If I was born and named Jane I’d be the next in line at the office to change my name)

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When a Mother Penguin loses her chick, she’ll often try to steal from other female penguins living in the vicinity.

(I wonder how many mom’s which they could trade their brat)

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The flavors of the foods a pregnant woman eats end up in the amniotic fluid — The baby might crave these tastes later in life.

(One of my friend’s mom ate those little black tire stubbies that stick out on a new tire….Hmmm — boy am I glad my mom craved radishes with me)

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In one week, the average person will learn more from Google than 4 years of high school.

(That my friends, is why Google is my best friend)

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Well, I hope you liked some of them, if you did check them out. The links are still above. I think you will like it. I couldn’t do them justice here, but I enjoy them.

 

 

Ohhhh, So, how many of you scratched your ankle?  LOLLLLL

 

~~~till we laugh again~~~

He’s an Adventurous One

I debated what I was going to write today. I know I have been doing some cheap fun laughs this week. No major life issues trying to find some laughter in. Yes, there have been some life issues, but isn’t that called daily life?

Sometimes I think we just need silly stuff to make us laugh. To be that kid at heart that just finds laughs in stupid things. I’m good at finding laughter in stupid things. Just ask my family.  LOL.

I do have a few posts I’m going to do next week on some more serious stuff, but hell, why ruin a silly week by going all serious? So I will be silly today.

As you know, I’m collecting some new friends. Yesterday I said I would introduce you to him. I’m still deciding what to name him. But for now I’ll call him Duckie.

`

Here is Duckie ~ He’s Hot!

Hot Pink that is.

Now, I discovered that Duckie is pretty adventurous.

On his first day home look at all the stuff he got himself into around the house.

He heard the dogs get treats when I get home, he couldn’t wait for his.


They were a little dry so then he needed some water.


He thought he’d hang out with the other birds

Then he got lost in time.


Silly duck doesn’t know popcorn isn’t good for him.


Hanging out with his new friends having a Coke


Whoops, looks like he found his way to the Pink Truck.

(Least he could do is wash the windows for me). 

Rut Ro..I think he is going to hitch a ride!

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Somehow I think we haven’t seen the end of Duckie’s adventures

To be continued….

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Have a great weekend everyone!

See you tomorrow for the Sunday Funnies!

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~~till we laugh again~~

Are You Taking the Challenge? These Might Help

So earlier today I challenged all my readers to make some laugh today

—->   The Laughter Challenge.  

 

Sounds like many, if not most of you were up for the challenge. We are almost half way through the 24 hour period so if you haven’t done it yet…..There is still plenty of time!

The baby pictures on that post were a hit, so I thought I’d add a few more here to help amp you up for the challenge. However if you don’t like babies, maybe not so much.  But keep reading anyways since i know you will like something.

So, let’s get to laughing! (I’ll settle for smiling too)   😀

Rut Ro.. I think I found something in my diaper

Dude! I so can smell it!

Oh, is that what that was??

Yea dude, I thought something was ripe

I’m not quite sure why all of you are laughing

Ok everyone, let’s go laugh!

~~~till we laugh again~~~

Are you a klutz too?

Don't Trip!

Ok, time to reach out to my fellow klutzes.

First off, when I was a young whipper snapper as the older generation likes to say, I tended to walk on my toes. Maybe I knew deep down I was only going to be 5’4″ and wanted to be taller. Who knows. Today I don’t walk on my toes any longer (I think) – unless you count walking up stairs on my toes which I still do.

However, I still have a problem with my feet many years later.

I won’t go into the gruesome details of explaining my feet. While I’m sure there is some foot fetish person reading this, the rest of you don’t care. Now, don’t be thinking they are all that bad cuz they aren’t. Except the one toe I busted open and I have lost the toenail twice. But I digress.

No, the issue my feet have is staying on the ground. If I wasn’t walking in the air, I was tripping over a feather as my pops would say. Ok, I’m a klutz. (Hence why I broke that toe by the way). I can be walking for no reason and my feet just decide they aren’t going with me and so the rest of me does that slow motion decent into the trying to act cool while I’m flailing like an idiot. You know the one. Arms swinging to catch one’s balance as the rest of you flies forward rapidly. Or maybe you even trip and hop forward a few steps then try and act cool.

Once in a blue moon, I even need to use that duck and roll move I learned growing up to prevent forest fires. I mean catching on fire. Landing after tripping on one’s own feet is tough. But while you sit or lay there on the ground, you begin to laugh at yourself before others get a chance too. Afterall, you know you aren’t hurt (pride doesn’t count) and you know it must have looked pretty darn funny. You look back and don’t see a massive boulder in your path so your excuses start to dwindle down. So you just suck it up and laugh.

And if I had a dollar every time I bang my toes into things I’d be a millionaire ten times over. Getting out of the shower – check. Walking by the bed – check. End table – check. Corner – check. Dog laying on floor – check. Carpet only – check. It really is sad.

Think about it, I’m just talking about feet that don’t work. This doesn’t include the numerous bruises people ask me about that I have no idea how I got them. I bang into more walls and corners and doors. I don’t even flinch anymore. I just keep moving. I’m like the terminator. Cuts, no problem. You should see the collection of scars I have. Each with their own little klutzy story to tell.

The average klutz will just get hurt a lot. But it takes true professional klutz to admit they have a Klutz for Life Membership Card. Do you have one?

 

~~~~~~~~~till we laugh again~~~~~~~~

Related articles

Best Way to End a Fight? Laugh!

Ever been in the middle of a heated conversation or disagreement (maybe even a full blown fight) and someone does something so unexpected you bust up laughing?  And no matter how hard you try, you just can’t muster up that anger or frustration like you did a few minutes prior.

Oh you know you have. Maybe one of you tooted or someone split their pants. Or tripped over the dog or stubbed their toe. Or maybe something less sinister as flubbing the words in a way that just hit you as funny. One or both of you started to chuckle and you know it.

You see, I’m a firm believer in anger serves us no real purpose. When we are mad we really aren’t listening to the other person. We are in our flight or fight mode. When we are angry many times we end up hurting those we love. And if we are angry at a stranger, the only one who gets hurt is ourselves because we give our power to someone else to control our emotions. So why be angry?

When you find yourself caught up in one of these moments. Find away to break the tension. Laugh. Get the giggles. Sure it will first be irritating to the other person at first, but soon they will also be laughing cuz you will just look to funny. Laughter is contagious.

And once the anger steps out of the way, you two can resolve the situation.

See, laughter cures many things.

 

~~~~till we laugh again~~~~

 

I Don’t Do Phone

Every Christmas a tradition goes on in many homes across the world – Pass the Phone Around.

Now, I’ve never been a fan of this particular tradition. It has always been a form of torture for me. I’m not sure if bamboo under the nails is worse. Tho I assume it has to be so I just do “phone” when required to be a good daughter or friend. (Although I failed miserably yesterday)

You see, I DON”T DO PHONE! Maybe you have someone in your family like me. My nephew is grooming to join my club.

Here is the issue. I hate talking on the phone. Period. I hate holding the phone to my head, I hate the talking. I hate the small talk. I hate being on hold. I hate everything about it. Those close to me know this. It took many years for them to accept it.

I feel worse for my mom as she probably has been hurt the most by this quirk of mine.(Although she does get at least one good call a week and sometimes I actually listen too). I have another family member that builds up her “7 minutes” of talk time that I must use each month.

Yea, I admit it, I have a bad memory on my calls. I’ve been known to hang up then be asked what did you two talk about? I’ll have a blank stare and honest to god I can not recall what we discussed. I know, I suck. I’m bad. I’m a terrible daughter, friend, co-worker, you name it. I accept my loserhood. I know a big part of this particular issue is my failure to not multi-task while talking. But just sitting or standing there listening to someone is like hitting me over the head with a 2 x 4.

Oh and don’t put me on hold. I will hang up. It’s nothing personal, I don’t do “phone” so I sure the heck don’t do “hold”. I’ve had several awesome administrative assistants in my time and one of the first things I told them is I hate being put on hold. I’m ok with you putting me on hold to take care of customers, employees or emergencies. But when I’m not there when you come back, don’t take it personal, just call me back. They all understood and accepted my deficency in this area.

Currently I’m trying to reach out to one of my sisters but we have a communication gap. She prefers phone, I prefer text, email, carrier pigeon, anything but talking on the phone. She on the other hand never looks at facebook, her cell is lost in her purse or the cushions and I think she forgot her email password or the dog ate it. Oh well, I guess that carrier pigeon option is starting to look better.

Ok, I will admit that bluetooth and headphones has helped. Only a tiny bit. I no longer need to hold the phone to my ear but I still have that small talk problem or even worse, paying attention 100%.

As we move into a new year, I could pretend to have a new resolution to be better at this, but I’d so be lying. I’ve hated it for the past 40 years I’ll hate it for the next 40.

In parting I have one thing to say…… TEXT ME! I promise we can have a conversation in short messages. It will feel like we talked for hours.

And if you love me… Please, please, please … Don’t make me do phone!   😀

 

~~~~~~till we laugh again~~~~~~~~~~

Yep! I’m Laughing at You

Let’s face it, we all do it. We all lie about it. And we might as well come clean.There is no shame.

A friend was telling me how she scuffed up her knees when she went flying when trying to out run someone. I pictured her getting her top half too far ahead of her feet and then gravity took it from there. Face plant.  (LOL – sorry, laughing just picturing it again – arms out, rolling around a few times, maybe a somersault or two). I told her I have been there so many times (I’m the family klutz). Even when we are the ones falling, we can’t help but laugh through the pain. Many a time I just sat there laughing my butt off thinking of the site I must have made.

Those around us want to bust a gut but we yell at  them that they better not laugh at us. So while there is genuine concern, the belly ache is just dying to be released. You can laugh and care at the same time. It’s freaking funny.

Slap stick has been a staple of our comedy for years. We love for people to fall down, bang into walls, hit someone over the head. Yet for some reason, we let those embarrassing moments cause us to scream “Are you laughing at me?” and we sheepishly go “No, not at all”   (even though our soda that just shot out our nose gave us away).

One day I was making a large drink for someone and knocked it over, spilling it all down my shirt and leg. I was so ticked off (and cold as it was a frozen drink) and we were busy and it made this huge mess. The guy I was working with just looked at me ready to die laughing but thought it might be safer for him to just look away. I looked at him and said “It’s ok, if it wasn’t me I’d be dying too.”

So I say in 2012 as part of our laugh a day, we embrace our truth. Yes! I am laughing at you. I”m sorry you got hurt, but that shit was funny!

 

~~~~~~ till we laugh again~~~~~