30 Jokes to Make Your Kids Laugh!

A Child’s Laughter Will Make the Strongest Weak

 

kids laughingWe all like to laugh. More fun is helping others laugh! The best type of laugh? One from a child. So here are 30 jokes you can tell to either an adult or a child and hopefully you can have lots of giggles and laughs!

Enjoy!

 

1     Q: What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

       A: A tuba toothpaste.

 

2     Q: What do lawyers wear to court?

      A: Lawsuits!

 

3     Q: What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary? 

       A: Take the words out of his mouth!

 

4    Q: Why do fish live in salt water?

      A: Because pepper makes them sneeze!

 

5    Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?

      A: Because 7, 8, 9.

 

6   Q: What did the pencil say to the other pencil?

     A: your looking sharp.

 

7   Q: Why did the picture go to jail?

    A: Because it was framed.

 

8   Q: What do you call cheese that’s not yours? 

   A: Nacho cheese!

 

9   Q: What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

     A: A watch dog.

 

10  Q: What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

      A: A lawn moo-er

 

11   Q: What do elves learn in school?

       A: The elf-abet.

investigator12  Q: What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant?

      A: Swimming trunks

 

13  Q: Who earns a living driving their customers away?

      A: A taxi driver

 

14  Q: Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? 

      A: He wanted to go to high school.

 

15  Q: How does a dog stop a video? 

      A: He presses the paws button

 

16  Q: What is black ,white and red all over?

      A: A sunburned penguin!

 

17  Q: How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

      A: Squeaky clean!

 

18  Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?

      A: Because it had a virus!

 

19  Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?

      A: A bulldozer!

 

20  Q: What is the tallest building in the world?

       A: The library! It has the most stories!

 

21  Q: Why did the girl smear peanut butter on the road? 

      A: To go with the traffic jam!

 

22  Q: Why couldn’t the pony sing himself a lullaby? 

       A: He was a little hoarse.

 

23  Q: Where do you put barking dogs?

       A: In a barking lot.

 

24  Q: What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

       A: A gummy bear!

porkchop25  Q: What do you call a pig who knows karate? 

      A: Porkchop!

 

26  Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes?

       A: No I deer!

 

27  Q: What do you call an exploding monkey?

      A: A baboom!

 

28  Q: What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? 

      A: Stuck!

 

29  Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

       A: Frostbite.

 

30  Q: Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

       A: Because of the bark!

 

If you loved what you read or at least most of the time….please do us a favor and share! Let’s help a lot of folks laugh!

 

~~~till we laugh again~~~

 

~~~

~




Buffets Are Nasty Unless You Like Your Food Sneezed On

Disclaimer: I’m not a fan of Buffets…

But I’m sure the Title gave that away.. LOL

 

The Nasty Buffet

 

The other day I came across this above picture on Pintrest. It was an article on Huffington Post.  I had to laugh as it pretty much sums up my thoughts on most buffets.

I know for many of you, Buffet’s might be the wholly grail of fine dining. After all, who wouldn’t love 8 plates of crab legs? Oh yea, me… I hate seafood remember.   🙂

Some of the longest lines I’ve ever seen are those at a casino’s Buffet. Heck, people will pay $40-$50 for those seafood buffets! That is crazy. Go to a nice restaurant people!  lol

While you may see a buffet and hear the angels sing, I see a buffet and just see food that is an hour or more old, hands picking through it, sneezing, germs. People playing with my food. Cooked with zero seasoning and barely recognizable as the true food it is.  crablegs

Heck, even those crab legs you love so much have you spending hours cracking and digging for little meat and lots of water. No wonder you need to eat 8 plates.  LOL

Now, I will say in defense of Buffets, they are one step up from the grosses thing on earth…PEAS!  Yep, if you recall, I think they are little round balls of puke!

So, what do you think of buffets?  Nasty or Heaven to you?

Have You Started a Pay it Forward Wave Yet? Start at McDonalds

Giving and Getting Can Feel So Good!

 

the waveWe all remember sitting at a sporting event and watching the wave of people standing and flinging their arms created a “wave”. If you have not had the opportunity yet to be part of a modern day wave at McDonalds then you are missing out. This one comes with a big smile and lot of happiness.

 

Like many of you, I run out the door every single day to go earn my keep. Unfortunately the bills do not pay themselves (at least not what I’ve been able to discovery yet).  Occasionally as part of my routine I go through our local McDonald’s for a sausage McMuffin and a drink. Being on a tight budget I allow myself this $2.38 splurge a couple times a week.

 

On more than one occasion I have been part of an amazing trend happening at McDonalds across the world. I’m not sure how big this is in your area or your town but in my little city our citizens that frequent our local McDonalds have loved a Pay it Forward Wave.

 

McDonalds ArchesHere’s how it works. On my most recent trip to the golden arches. I pull into our drive thru and order my normal breakfast splurge. I have a gift card that is burning a hole in my pocket so I’m all prepared for my expensive $2.38 meal. While waiting, I noticed a weird thing going on at the pay window. Every car that stops seems to be having an issue. The kid looks to be explaining stuff to them and it doesn’t look like they are verifying a caramel latte vs an iced coffee. All of a sudden I smile because I have seen this confusion before. Yes, I know exactly what this is as I have experienced this myself a few weeks ago.

 

About a month ago I was making this same routine stop. When I got to the window the teenage clerk just smiled at me and said “You don’t owe anything as the car ahead of you paid for your order.”  I can only imagine my face because I’m sure my look was one of being dumb founded. All I could do was just stare at the 18 year old with a look of confusion and thoughts racing through my head of what am I supposed to do next? So I froze and said, “ah ah… thank you”. Feeling stupid because I really didn’t know what you’re supposed to do next.

 

As I pulled away, I realized I was just part of the magic moment. Yes I was part of a Pay it Forward McDonalds moment. If you’ve ever been part of one you know the feeling I’m talking about. I also knew that if it happened again, I would know what I would do. What I had to do.

 

The neat thing about these Pay if Forward moments is they are totally random. So on this particular trip the other day I could see from the confusion going on in front of me that we might be on another wave and I was not going to be the one that broke that wave. No I was not going to be the person sitting in my seat with my arms crossed, a scowl on my face not wanting to participate in this event. This time I was going to jump out my seat with all the enthusiasm I could muster.

 

Pay it ForwardWhen I got to the window and was told that the car in front of me had paid my $2.38 breakfast I knew what to do this time. First I waved at the car in front of me a thank you (not that I think they saw me but it felt like the right thing to do). Then I asked what the car behind me owed. Now in this situation your worst fear is that it’s a lady with 8 kids in a van. So I looked in my rearview mirror and noticed one person in a car so I felt pretty confident that I was not going to get stuck with a $30 breakfast order. While I was prepared to do my part, my gift card was reminding me that it only had so much on it.

 

She smiled, looked at the next order than with a little look of disappointment told me that it was more than mine as they owed $8.62. But I knew that wasn’t going to end this wave! Not today. I knew I needed to make another person’s day. I knew I was paying it forward!

 

So I pay the $8.62 and slowly start to crawl up to the next window. All the while looking in my rear view mirror hoping that not only do get to make the next person’s day but they will continue the wave and make even more people happy this morning. Sure enough the smiling clerk is trying to explain what happened. I see the finger pointing at my truck and then I see it happen! I see them hand over their credit card. Yes! They were continuing the wave! They were paying it forward too! They were paying for the next car!

 

No I don’t know how many cars we’re in that wave that morning. But I do know that at least from what I could see there were 7 cars for sure. Seven people who started their morning with a big smile because somebody cared about them and then they got to do what made them feel good. They got to pay it forward too. The act of giving feels so good.

 

McDonaldsNow some of you might think the joy over having a $2.38 breakfast paid for seems so minor. But it has nothing to do with the $2.38. It has to do with knowing that there is still joy in the world. Love in the world and people that care. With so much negativity on TV and in our social media it is nice to know there are still people out there who get joy in helping others. No matter how small.
So if you have never experienced the McDonalds Pay it Forward Wave then I challenge you to start one. On your next trip to McDonalds just casually ask the cashier what the car behind you owes.  Then offer to pay for their meal. Don’t have a lot of Money? Then do it at breakfast. Most people are like me getting a sandwich and a drink and many others are just getting a coffee. It isn’t about how much you pay it forward just that you do pay it forward.

 

So go on out and make someone else’s day. I promise it feels good!

Two New Kiddos in the House

Meet My New Babies

 

Upton and BuddyA few weeks ago I brought two new babies home. Please meet Buddy & Upton. These two little guys make me smile and laugh each day!

Buddy is on the left and Upton on the right.

Granted, I’m not laughing at 5am when they want to go out to go “potty”. LOL

Living in the desert has its challenges with little dogs. Having no real backyard, it isn’t like we can just let them out to roam around. They must be taken out to go and they always think it is play time.

The other thing I’ve learned is, neither like thunder! We have had several storms (including one right now as I write this). Ever see two 5lb Yorkies shaking like there is no tomorrow?

I’m sure I’ll be sharing some of our adventures in the future so I thought I’d take a moment to introduce them to you.

I better go, the storm is getting worse and they need to be held. Time to be a good mommy.   🙂

Our New Home!

Welcome to Our New Home!

SMMH House OnlyWelcome to those of you that have hopped over from my old site!  Here is our new home! Your old email list will not work so if you love getting those emails when I have new content, make sure to sign up over there —->>>

I’m adding a new feature too! I know many of you have other types of blogs but might get an itch to share your funny life moments or find ways to share with others unique things about you that make you laugh. So if you ever get an itch to share let me know! Check out: Guest Blogging

Those of you that are new…Welcome! If you are Proud of NOT Being Normal…then you are in the right place!

Wish Me Luck

Time to pack my bags…

packed bags

Ok, I’ve decided to make the jump to a .org site. I’m working on moving it all over….

If all goes well you will see some changes coming soon but I hope to create 2.0 version that I commit to updating on a regular basis. Keep those fingers crossed!    🙂

 

 

crossed fingersDrats! I forgot I can’t cross my fingers!  LOL

 

 

(That is funny if you remember my old post…)